Gentlies and ladlemen,
Welcome to the latest newest blog on the entire internet.
Before long, it should be chock-full of quirky observations about the crazy words we use, and the weird world in which we use them.
Hey, did you notice that the words entire and internet are cobbled together from the same five letters?
And did you know that each of them - e, n, t, i and r - will only earn you 1 measly point in Scrabble? That’s because they’re five of our most common nine letters – along with a, o, s and h.
And did you know that, etymologically speaking, letters are indeed French?
Sorry, sorry. Now I’m getting carried away. (Some say I should be.)
Anyway, here we are. Stuck in a blog. With no paper.
Which is the perfect image for introducing my next category…
You see, we’ll also be plumbing the murky depths of advertising, and politics, and the advertising of politics – since that’s what a lot of people think I do.
(I did. But I don’t. Now I do public speaking, and private writing.)
And there’ll be the odd rhyme too, I dare say. Most of my rhymes are odd. Especially the ones that don’t rhyme.
Mary had a little lamb.
She couldn’t eat the rest.
When the time is right, I’ll be unveiling my new New Zealand flag, which is not the least bit odd. And my new Taiwanese National Anthem, which is.
Who knows what else we’ll be getting up to?
At the very least, I hope you and I will be able to use this humble forum to simplify the world, so I can understand it.
Mank you thery vuch.