Ansell’s Ductionerry of Mispronounciations

A bug thenk yoe to those who contrubuted. Hair nairw is the first edution:

Air – how

Air gun? – How are you going?

An enemy – anemone

Another thing coming – another think coming (my own mistake!)

Any fink – anything

Ardest – artist

Asterix – asterisk

Athol eat – athlete

Awso – also

Axe – ask (African American)

Bairww – bell

Baww – ball

Beer – bare

Biww – bill

Bling cut – blanket

Blowen – blown

Bug – big

But – bit

Buww – bull

Can date – candidate

Car mourn – come on

Ceremoany – ceremony

CerVIEcal – cervical

Cheer – chair

Chlorine – clawing

Cloyed key – Clyde Quay

Coined – kind

Congradulations – congratulations

Cooww – cool

Cruel accounting – accrual accounting

Cut – kit

Cut shin – kitchen

Deer – dare

De tier rating – deteriorating

Deteriating – deteriorating

Devoid – divide

Droring – drawing

Ella funt – elephant

Every fink – everything

Fear – fair

Febree – February

Febuary – February

(Jeanette) Fitzsimmons – Fitzsimons

Foyt – fight

Foined – find

Floin – flying

Freud – fried

Freud chuckin’ – fried chicken

Freud eh – Friday

Furs day – Thursday

Godiv Neigh Shuns – God of Nations

Goid – guide

Growen – grown

Head – had

Hedant – hadn’t

Heenious – heinous

Heenis – heinous

Hoy – high

Hoyts – heights

Hunt – hint

HurriCANE – hurricane (hurrikin)

Hut – hit

I head the baww – I had the ball

Kea – care

(John) Keys – Key

Kil-omm-etre – kilometre

Kim Yoon Tee – community

Knowen – known

Larva – lover

Lectral ptishun – electoral petition

Lemming tin – lamington

Lenth – length

Liberians – librarians

Lieberry – library

Loin – line

Luddle butt – little bit

Mischievious – mischievous

Moined – mind

Moyle – mile

Muwk – milk

Myzild – misled

Nigh – no

Noyce – nice

Nucular – nuclear

Optune tea – opportunity

Perogative – prerogative

Piss cryption – prescription

Pitcher – picture

Problee – probably

Pronounciation – pronunciation

Quoits – kites

Renumeration – remuneration

Reuter – writer

Sad day – Saturday

Saline – sailing

Sheer – share

Showen – shown

Shovelry – chivalry

Shut – shit

Sidiv – sort of

Sievin’ – seven

Skier – scare

Sko – let’s go

Skoda bed – let’s go to bed

Skoi – sky

Skunk – skink

Slut – slit

Smaw -small

Spaykung – speaking

Spear – spare

Spoyce – spice

Sput – spit

Stray Leah – Australia

Sut dairn – sit down

Taww – tall

Thenk yoe – thank you

Tier – tear

Toyah – tire, tyre

Troy – try

Try Athol on – triathlon

Uk setra – et cetera

Un – in

Unvoice – invoice

Voice – vice

Vunrubble – vulnerable

19 thoughts on “Ansell’s Ductionerry of Mispronounciations

  1. And pronouncing a ‘d’ instead of ‘t’; a favourite of two former female Prime Ministers, who would refer to the Labour Pardy, and the National Pardy. It’s now rife on television and radio. Curiously the spelling remains unchanged.

  2. And pronouncing a ‘d’ instead of ‘t’; a favourite of two former female Prime Ministers, who would refer to the Labour Pardy, and the National Pardy. It’s now rife on television and radio. Curiously the spelling remains unchanged.

  3. A favourite of my third form French teacher
    Rugby commentator: e’s gorgeous under the post (he’s scored just under the post)

  4. Thanks for your suggestions. I feel an update coming on. Some others:

    Adeline – out of line

    Air dune – How are you doing?

    At – out

    At a bairns – out of bounds

    At there – out there

    Byood fooww – beautiful

    Conf dunce – confidence

    Crayon – crown

    De velp munt – development

    Ear – air

    Ear Nyo Zullund – Air New Zealand

    Geoww – girl

    Gurww – girl

    Hez tate – hesitate

    Mare car – America

    Mezh munt – measurement

    Munster – minister

    Munstruther Crayon – Minister of the Crown

    Nesh noow – national

    Nyo – new

    Nyo Zullund – New Zealand

    Pap ram – Paraparam

    Pardy piwws – pills

    Prog div – prerogative

    Pry Munster – Prime Minister

    Pudder puddumu – Paraparaumu

    Stiss diss dicks – statistics

    Unta nesh noow – international

  5. A nuvva – another

    Arks – ask

    Blend – bland

    Bovva – bother

    Bruvva – brother

    Duvva dind – dividend

    Ewes – you

    Festival – first of all

    Foiled – filed

    Oiland – Ireland, island

    Muvva – mother

    Nuff ink – nothing

    Oil – I’ll

    Pier – pair, pear

    Prostrate – prostate

    Puck din – Picton

    Response baldy – responsibility

    Tea ah mood ooh – Te Awamutu

    The Hawk’s Bay – Hawkes Bay

    Un – in

    Ut – it

    Uvva – other

    Woolington – Wellington

    Woy rapper – Wairarapa

  6. Is is “I” raq or “E” raq please? I hear both options on the radio and television.

    “Fella’s” or “felluhs” for fellows. Usually preceeded nowadays by “ewes”.

    Tea Tie Bay for Titahi Bay

    Pard’n nui for Pauatahanui

  7. Hi John, these would make great t-shirt printed captions, you should sell them to whomever paints the sayings on t-shirts! Dale

  8. Oh gosh, this is hilarious! I am an English major in college (just like my mother was) but as a kid I was so afraid to say “ask” b/c it either sounded like “ass” or “ax”. When I was five I would become so afraid if my first grade teacher called on me to read out loud and I noticed the word “ask” somewhere in the sentence. I pretty much went the next couple of years avoiding the word. I’m not sure when I stopped doing that exactly but by third grade I could say “ask” properly. Whew!
    So when I saw “ask (african american)” on your list I had to laugh!

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